I Don’t Know

 

as I amble down the concrete path

the pinkish sky fading into the abyss

a feeling of unexpected calmness washes over me

and I’ve never felt more unsure.

I can hear the distinct sounds

of unsuppressed laughter and celebratory chants

floating along the cool evening breeze

like a distant echo of a dream returned.

but I can’t join in.

my emotions are too conflicted to simply feel one.

instead, I enjoy the last few moments

in this little bubble

wandering into my favourite building

sneaking up to the fifteenth floor

and pressing my hands and face against the cool glass

taking in the perfect view of the capital city

I’m not ready to leave yet.

or maybe I’m just scared

of being alone and uninspired

and I’d rather stay here forever

then find out what happens after this

because the truth is

I don’t know.

I don’t know what will happen.

it seems like the entire world is watching

waiting for me to make a choice

and I’m not sure I’ll make the right one.

if this is adulthood

then I am not equipped.

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One comment

  1. Rachel · April 28, 2016

    You put in words what I personally feel. You’re not alone in this feeling. Being an adult is scary and new to us, but I am sure our parents felt the same way.

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